42. A reminiscence is an example of "official memory". Things one dredges up that one has recalled already many times before. Random, I suppose, is meant to help get around this - a watered-down, willed version of Proust's "involuntary memory". These notes of mine seem to illustrate a failure of memory, rather than an active sense... I mean, there are great swaths of abandoned times & experiences. Think of everything that happens in a single day.

43. I wrote a small book of anecdotes about our cat, Blackie, when I was about 12. When Blackie was run over by a car, I tore the manuscript into tiny pieces.